7 Trik Mulus (atau Bulus?) Mengenalkan Pacar ke Keluarga

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Sudah punya pacar atau pacar baru? Alhamdulillah kalau sudah.

Apa? Belum juga? *pukpuk dulu* Didoakan semoga cepat dapat pacar baru jadi artikel ini bisa dipraktikkan segera ya 🙂

Semua orang, tepatnya, hampir semua lesbian pasti ingin pacarnya bisa diperkenalkan ke orang-orang terdekat. Ke keluarga dan teman-teman dekat terutama. Sayangnya, hal ini nggak semudah teman-teman kita yang straight. Apalagi buat yang belum come out. Pasti karena jadinya bingung, mau dikenalin takut dicurigain and awkward, tapi kalo nggak dikenalin nanti susah kalau ada apa-apa. Ada apa-apa itu misalnya kalau kepergok lagi mangkal di pengkolan lalu kena garukan Satpol. Ah, nggak, nggak. Bukan. Maksudnya, misalnya kalau kepergok lagi nonton berdua pacar sama kakak kamu. Kalau sudah diperkenalkan dengan baik, at least masih bisa ngeles-ngeles bilang, “Iya nih si Mawar maksa nonton gara-gara yang lain nggak ada yang mau nemenin dia nonton ‘Zombie Perawan Goyang Gergaji’!” atau sejuta penjelasan (lebih tepatnya sebenarnya alasan sih, hahaha) lainnya akan lebih luwes diutarakan kalau yang mergokin kalian sudah lebih dulu mengenal pacarmu sebagai teman baik.

Meet the Parents!

Tantangannya: Gimana caranya memperkenalkan pacar ke orangtua atau keluarga senatural mungkin dan membuat mereka percaya pacar kamu adalah teman baik, walaupun entah dari mana datangnya kok tau-tau dia makbedunduk ada dalam hidup kamu.

Tips

1. Nggak perlu tegang.

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Bilang ke pacar, nggak usah tegang kayak Kanebo belum kena air atau kayak mau ketemu calon mertua yang bakalan nyuruh dia ngijab kabulin anaknya. Percayalah, ekspresi wajah yang tegang ini bisa terbaca dan malah bikin curiga ada apa-apa. Apalagi kalau tegangnya sambil ngeliatin sandal Mama kamu terus, disangkain mau nyolong  sandal nanti. Hehehe nggak deng. Kalau pacar kamu tetap tegang, ajak ngobrol dan bercanda.

2. Skenario. Kamu sudah harus bikin skenario dulu sama pacar kamu, mau memperkenalkan dia sebagai apa. Saran yang paling aman adalah teman di lingkungan keseharian yang sama: teman sekolah, teman kuliah, teman kantor. Grade duanya adalah: teman les, teman komunitas/klub, atau teman apalah asal bukan teman tapi mesra kecuali emang  kalian berdua mau langsung dirukiyah di tempat, hahaha.. Oh iya, kasih tau juga keluarga kamu dengan cara seperti ngobrol biasa/sekilas aja, apa keperluan pacar kamu datang ke rumah. Misalnya, “Eh iya, lo ke sini kan karena mau ngopi file ya. Mana sini hard disk-nya bawa nggak?”

3. Awas pertanyaan jebakan. Kalau sudah tau posisinya sebagai teman apa, pastikan kalian punya jawaban yang sama dan kompak kalau ditanya tentang: ketemu/kenal di mana dan sejak kapan main bareng. Dua poin yang sepertinya simple tapi sesungguhnya adalah jebakan batman paling efektif kalau kalian jawabnya tergagap-gagap atau berbeda satu sama lain.

4. Kontrol bahasa tubuh dan muscle memory!

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Namanya orang pacaran, kadang mungkin kita suka refleks melirik pacar dengan mata berbinar-binar, tiba-tiba ngelus-ngelus punggung, ngelapin remah kue di pinggiran bibir pacar, atau sekadar gandeng tangan. Watch it! Di depan keluarga, hal-hal kayak gini harus dikontrol. Kalau nggak yakin bisa kontrol, usahakan posisi tubuh jangan dekat-dekat pacar kamu dulu. Ini akan meminimalkan risiko kelepasan bahasa tubuh. Untuk eye contact, kalau nggak mau kelepasan keliatan memandang dengan penuh bunga-bunga, hindari saling bertatapan lebih dari 3 hitungan. Sementara aja kok, pas di depan keluarga aja. Kalau nggak yakin bisa, pakai kacamata item sana! :))))

5. Penggunaan panggilan. Nah, tentukan juga kalian mau saling manggilnya pakai apa. Aku-kamu atau lo-gue. Kalau keluarga taunya kamu biasa ngomong lo-gue sama teman-teman, apalagi yang dekat, mungkin bisa dipertimbangkan pakai lo-gue dulu. Untuk menghindari kesan spesial aja sih. Karena sesungguhnya yang spesial itu telor bebeknya biasanya tiga. Ah, nggak, nggak. Kembali ke topik, tapi kalau sama teman-teman biasanya kamu juga pakai aku-kamu, no probs then.

6. Kasih bocoran dan umpan lambung. Ada saatnya mungkin kamu dan pacar kamu perlu saling mencari bahan pembicaraan. Akan sangat membantu kalau dia tau latar belakang keluarga kamu. Yang simple-simple aja, kayak misalnya ceritain deh bahwa Mama kamu jago masak rendang. Pas lagi makan bareng kan kamu bisa lempar umpan lambung bahas makanan, lalu pacar kamu bisa ngobrolin masakan apa yang mau dipelajari *mengarah ke rendang tentunya nih, ehe. Terus biarkan pacar dan Mama kamu ngobrol gimana cara masak rendang yang enak. Papa jago ngoprek mobil? Kasih tau pacar kamu supaya nanti dia bisa (sok) konsultasi gimana biar mobilnya mesinnya bunyinya halus. Inget ya, bocorannya tentang sesuatu yang bisa jadi bahan pembicaraan menyenangkan. Nggak perlu bocorin kalau Papa kamu tompelan di pantat, misalnya.

7. Outfit. Last but not least, the way she dresses.

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Kamu yang paling tau gimana keluarga kamu dan pacar kamu. Kalau keluarga kamu agak nyinyir tentang penampilan, kasih tau pacar supaya datang dengan baju kasual dan santun. Itu yang paling aman. Jangan disuruh dateng pakai celana emesh dulu ya 😀 Jangan juga disuruh datang pake celana kulit hitam ketat dan bawa cambuk. Jeans dan kemeja atau t’shirt udah paling aman untuk gaya kasual yang netral, tinggal mix-and-match aja sisanya kok.

Nah, tujuh aja dulu ya. Soalnya yang ke delapannya adalah berdoa. Good luck! 😀

(Kaleia, @sehangat_hati)

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