Coming Out

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Ini sebenarnya topik basi yang entah kenapa nggak kelar-kelar dibahas, hahaha… Thanks to Jenny’s wedding for inspiring me to write this topic.

Coming
out
ibarat mempertaruhkan nyawa. Coming out is not just about your
sexual preference
. Coming out is a part of self identity. Identitas diri
yang tidak bisa diedit atau direvisi sesuka hati. Identitas diri yang
telah lama tersimpan dan terpatri dalam diri orang-orang yang mengenal
kalian bisa bubar hanya karena pernyataan “Saya lesbian/gay”.

Coming out juga
bukan ajang unjuk diri. I know there’s one point in your life, when you
want to show to people around you that you are finally accept yourself
for who the hell you are. Hu-uh. I’ve been there
. Selamat kepada kamu
yang diterima. Beruntunglah, orang-orang di sekitarmu menerima kamu apa
adanya. Ini terlepas dari benar-benar peduli atau memang sebodo amat. Tapi, ini akan
menjadi bumerang bagi kamu yang tidak berpikir konsekuensi apa yang
menunggu di depan kamu.

Girls… Kamu akan
kehilangan teman, sahabat, keluarga, hingga pekerjaanmu hanya karena
kalimat “Gue lesbian/gay”. Iya, kalimat yang pengucapannya tidak lebih
dari tiga puluh detik ini mampu membumihanguskan semua lini kehidupanmu.
Lebay? Go try and tell me after that. In terms and conditions they
oppose
. Kalau mereka menerima dengan baik, saya juga tahu rasanya adem luar dalam. Being
in the closet isn’t bad. And, protect your identity as lesbian/gay in
the closet isn’t easy too
.

Buat seseorang yang beneran discreet,
seseorang tersebut bisa menjadi sangat picky dalam pertemanan
lesbian/gay-nya. Tipe in the closet aja kadang kecolongan ada yang tahu,
entah karena temannya punya gaydar terlalu bagus atau ada backstabber. Dan,
please… sebelum coming out, tolong pikirkan orang di sekeliling kalian. Karena, ini
nggak hanya tentang kalian, loh. Ada banyak hal yang menyertai hal itu. Mulai dari
orangtua, kakak-adik (kalau ada), hingga saudara dan orang-orang terdekat. Ikatan darah bahkan bisa jadi lebih sulit. Jatuhnya, kalian yang jadi disalahkan. Kecuali, ada
tanda-tanda keluarga pro dengan orientasi seksual kalian. Go on.
Kalo ragu, tunggu waktu yang tepat. At least, you both (you and your
partner) settle down financially. Money does matter
. Terburuknya, have
dual life
. Saya mengatakan dual life bukan berarti menyetujui ya. Itu kembali ke pilihan masing-masing pribadi. Kalau merasa
hal itu terbaik untuk diri sendiri, ya silakan, andai tidak, jangan dilanjutin. Dual
life
yang saya maksud adalah seseorang memiliki dua kehidupan.
Kehidupan pura-pura menjadi heteroseksual (menyukai laki-laki) dan homoseksual dengan
situasi kamu bebas berekspresi. For you, who’s still in the closet, make
sure you have one thing, or anything that can express yourself. Be who you are!

Temuin satu aja. Gapapa satu orang atau satu kegiatan. You gotta
survive here, homophobia country
.

(Lei Natch, @LeiNatch)

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