Siapa Takut Kenalkan Doi ke Teman?

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Senang rasanya mengenalkan partner ke lingkungan terdekat kita. Selain ke keluarga, mengenalkan pacar cantik ke kantor, sekolah, atau komunitas juga bikin deg-degan. Perasaan khawatir kalau nantinya mereka akan curiga bahwa kita adalah pencinta sesama itu pasti ada.

Sejak pertama kali saya bekerja, teman-teman sudah curiga. Banyak yang bisik-bisik di belakang, ada pula yang terang-terangan bertanya. Namun semuanya diungkapkan dengan baik-baik, setidaknya sampai saya menulis ini, dan sampai sekarang sudah jadi jomblo (malah curhat hehe). Sebenarnya kondisi baik-baik saja ini sengaja saya ciptakan sih. Mungkin tips ini bisa teman-teman gunakan juga.

  • Kenalkan pacar dengan lingkungan

Sebelum dibawa ke kantor, sekolah atau komunitas, buat si dia memiliki gambaran. Sering bercerita soal keadaan dan orang-orang di sekitarmu saat kalian sedang berdua. Selalu sertakan nama temanmu setiap menceritakan apa yang sedang kamu kerjakan. Misalnya, kamu sedang makan dengan siapa, si Anita yang suka marah saat PMS, Pak Susilo yang genit dengan mbok jamu, dan sebagainya. Tunjukkan juga foto-foto mereka agar si pacar semakin kenal.

  • Dia ini saudara kok

Ketika mengenalkan doi ke teman, kamu bisa memperkenalkan dia sebagai saudara. Nah jika kalian memiliki ciri fisik yang jauh berbeda, bilang saja kalau doi itu teman. Teman apa pun. Kalau saya lebih sering bilang teman jalan-jalan. Yang perlu diingat adalah gestur kita. Tatapannya biasa aja, ngomongnya biasa aja. Menurut pengalaman, yang paling sulit ketika teman cowok minta dikenalin dan godain doi. Harus pinter-pinter nutupin cemburunya.

  • Tanggapi dengan canda

Beberapa waktu lalu, saat lagi pusing karena berantem lewat WhatsApp sama pacar (sekarang mantan :3), ada teman saya yang bilang, “Perempuan memang gitu. Sudah”. Tentu kaget dong. Kok dia tahu saya sedang berantem dengan pacar. Tapi harus pandai menguasai keadaan. Saya pun menjawab, “Iya, besok sama cowok aja deh”. Percakapan seperti itu sering sekali saya hadapi, sejauh saya bisa menyikapi dengan santai, hasilnya baik-baik saja.

Saya pernah baca di bukunya Paulo Coelho, Alkemis, yang cukup menginspirasi untuk melakukan seperti yang diceritakan sebelumnya. Saat itu ada musafir yang membawa harta dalam kantongnya. Di tengah padang pasir, dia dihadang perampok. Si perampok tanya apa isi kantong itu dan musafir menjawab dengan jujur. Eh, malah nggak jadi dirampok karena si perampok mengira yang diucapkan musafir adalah bualan. Sejauh ini hal tersebut saya coba lakukan dan posisi saya di kantor tetap aman sih.

  • Sesekali puji lelaki

Yang paling menarik di dunia ini memang perempuan. Tapi untuk mengamankan diri, bolehlah sesekali puji lelaki. ‘Eh mas anu ganteng ya.’ ‘Si Joko keren pakai baju batik.’ Plus pujian lainnya. Saya tidak bisa menguraikan panjang soal cara ini hehehe.

  • Kenalkan pacar dengan salah satu teman

Kenalkan si Puan dengan teman yang paling dekat dengan kita juga sangat membantu. Si teman ini bisa mendukung bahwa kamu dan pacarmu tidak ada apa-apa. Menurut pengalaman sih dengan ada yang kenal pacar dan teman ini justru membuat saya lebih leluasa untuk mengajak doi ke lingkungan terdekat. Doi bisa ngobrol dengan si teman. Oh iya, satu lagi keuntungannya adalah meminimalisir rasa cemburu si pacar.

  • Cerita dengan teman terpercaya

Cerita soal orientas seksual ke teman menurut saya adalah suatu hal yang melegakan. Sejauh ini, pasti ada teman yang tahu soal orientasi seksual saya. Deg-degan pastinya setiap kali mau kasih tahu. Rasa khawatir kalau si teman tidak bisa dipercaya juga pasti ada.

Saya punya beberapa kriteria memilih teman yang akan tahu soal orientasi seksual saya. Pertama dia tidak fanatik. Itu terlihat dari gimana si teman menyikapi keadaan. Apa si teman ini suka menghakimi seseorang atau tidak. Yang kedua, saya gunakan hati. Kalau hati saya merasa nyaman cerita, pasti saya cerita.

Nah, keuntungannya adalah saat kita ada masalah dengan pacar, si teman bisa diajak cerita. Kalau saya malah sering nginep kosan teman saat punya masalah dengan pacar. Lumayan ada yang ngurusin, ada yang ingatkan makan. Hehehe.

Demikian sedikit tips yang pernah saya lakukan. Hal tersebut tidak mutlak berhasil, tapi boleh dicoba. Yang perlu diingat, pacar yang kenal dengan lingkungan kita membuat doi nggak ngeribetin hehehe.

(Ano, @Ano24627855)

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