Today is Jules’ birthday. “What do you wanna do on your birthday, Babe?” Ashley asked her. “I don’t want anything, I just want to spend my birthday with you. Maybe we can watch movie and eat a lot of pizzas.”
“Come on Jules, there must be something you really wanna do. Just tell me and we can do it together.”
“Ummm… Okay. I always want to go to the new theme park.”
A theme park? Ashley thought she might not have much strength to go to the theme park, but it’s Jules’ and she just wanted to see her smile, a smile that she will remember forever.
“Okay let’s go to the theme park!”
“Yeaaay thank you, Ash! I’m gonna get ready,” Jules bounced up and down as she’s running to her best friend and hug her tight.
They spend a whole day at a theme park. Ashley even made a cake made from cotton candy and gave it to Jules. They enjoyed every ride there. Well, Jules enjoyed it and Ashley tried her best to keep standing on her own feet.
Jules begged her to ride a rollercoaster before they went home. Ashley just didn’t feel well. She felt sick and tired but she knew that this is Jules’ birthday and maybe it’s her last birthday with her so she didn’t want to ruin it just because she felt sick.
“Ash, are you okay? We don’t have to ride the rollercoaster if you don’t want to.”
Yes, I don’t want to, but you want it. “What? Of course, I want to. Come on let’s go in the line.”
The ride was awful, Ashley used to enjoy rollercoaster. She loves roller coaster, but now it’s just different. But seeing Jules’ happy face, all of the awful feelings suddenly gone.
“Jules, can you drive? I just feel really tired.”
Jules look at her pale face and know that something wasn’t right. She just nodded and Ashley gave the key to her.
Ashley tried to untangle her hand with Jules. She slipped out from the bad quietly. It’s 2 AM and she felt her stomachache is getting worse and she needed her pills, but she didn’t want to wake Jules. As she reached their bedroom door, she quietly opened it and closed it again and ran into the kitchen. What she didn’t know was Jules already woke up when she untangled her hand. She felt tears slowly falls down her eyes, she felt useless, she couldn’t help Ashley while Ashley always there to help her. She just felt useless and it makes her sad.
“Ugh, I swear this bag is killing me,” Olive said as she arrived at the boutique.
“Olive, I think you should looking for another designer.”
“Why do I have to look for another designer when I already have the best designer?”
“I’m serious, you should find one. I have a few friends that I can recommend it to you.”
“But they’re not as good as you Ash.”
“This is gonna be my last project Olive.”
“What? What are you talking about? Ashley, are you drunk? Geez!”
“I wanna go somewhere far far away.”
“Where? Just tell me you want to take a vacation”
“No, I’m gonna go to our mother’s place.”
Their mother is passed away six years ago. Two months after their father died, she just couldn’t live without him and it made her sad. She kept telling them that she wanted to be with their dad.
Olive didn’t know Ashley was sick, well nobody did. Except for Jules, Sam and Jane who accidentally knew it when Ashley fainted after they’re having dinner. And right now, Ashley is telling her.
Olive was so speechless, she couldn’t say anything, she couldn’t think, she didn’t know what’s going on so she just ran, she left Ashley alone in her office.
But suddenly she felt angry at Ashley, “You’re fucking kidding, right? Don’t make a cruel joke like that, Ash! It’s not fucking funny!”
“If you wanna go, then go. Go home! I don’t need you anymore, I’m just gonna find someone to finish this project. Just go home now! I don’t need you!” Olive is yelled at her, she just sat there and thinking what she has done to make Olive that mad? She never mad, she never yells.
“Is she gonna be okay without me Q? You’ll gonna look out for her don’t you?”
“Don’t say like that Ash, you’re not dying.”
Ashley didn’t answer it, she just chuckled.
“How is her relationship with Jane? Did she tell you anything? Because every time I asked her, she just tries to change the subject.”
“Yeah, well I met Jane the other day and she told me about Jules. She said that Jules is always trying to avoid her and when she asked why she just told her that she realized that she don’t need anybody else, she just needs you.”
It broke Ashley’s heart.
Ashley sat on her couch with photo albums at her lap. She took a good look at the picture. Picture of her and all her friends and family. She found one album with her and Jules’ photo in it. When they’re in the college, holding hands after graduation. She could’t help but cry remembering that day. How happy she is for having such great friends like them. She’s gonna miss them so much.
Gosh, I’m not afraid of the death. I’m afraid if I can’t see them again. She said to herself and started to cry.
She decided to ask Jules about Jane on the next day.
“I don’t need him Ash, and obviously she doesn’t need me now. I need you and right now you need me.”
“Jules, you can’t just tell someone who loves you so much to back off and tell her that you don’t need her. You need her, Jules. And I know you love her too.”
“I do love her Ash, but right now I just want to spend my time with you and she’s always in the way. She just doesn’t get it.”
“I’m fine, Jules. I promise you I’m fine. From now on, you gotta spend more time with her. She loves you, Jules. She won’t hurt you.” Jules remained silent.
“And I invited your parents to come next week. Sorry, I didn’t tell you first, but I know if I tell you, you will say no.”
“You have no right to do that, Ash!” When it come to her parents, Jules just can’t help herself to feel angry, but Ashley knew that she’ll need them one day, so she needed to fix this quick as she time is getting closer.
“I never ask you for anything Jules, I just ask you this one thing. Your parent loves you. No matter what, and I can’t be there for you forever.” She started to sob hard.
“ASHLEY! I don’t need anybody, nobody understands me like you do. Everybody just thinks that I’m stupid, but you’re not. You’re my best friend and you always look after me since we were kids. I don’t need anybody!” Jules couldn’t help herself, she started to cry hard.
“I know I’m gonna need my parents and Jane to look after me someday. I know Ash, and I’m scared. I just can’t imagine how my life would be without you in it. I’m gonna miss you so much that it hurt, seeing you hurt is hurting me. I feel useless, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to help you.”
Hearing that Ashley snapped, Jules knew. All this time she knew. Ashley hated to see her cry and now she made her cry.
Ashley didn’t say anything, she just held her tight as they’re both crying hard.
They’re both lying on their bed, Ashley’s arm wrap around Jules’ waist.
“Ash, are you sleeping?” Jules turned her body to see Ashley who looked so pale with her eyes closed. She hoped that Ashley just sleeping. She shook her body but Ashley was not moving.
“Ash…,” she tried again.
“Quinn, Ashley….. She’s not moving. I don’t know what to do…” Jules said and sobbing.
“Call the ambulance, Jules! I’ll be there in 5 minutes.”